You don't know me, and you don't even care.

Wala lang.
I feel so hopeless at times, and what makes my heart ache more is the fact that no one seemed to care. It seems like no one understands me, especially at the time when I need someone to be there when nobody else does. It seems like everyone has to blame me for everything. And everyone had to make me feel like I do no good in everything.
Sinisisi nila ako sa lahat ng bagay. Lahat na lang pinapansin nila. Porket nakikita lang nila akong nagko-computer, ako na agad ang dahilan kung bakit ang taas ng kuryente namin. Why do they have to be so cruel to me? Lahat na lang ng mali ko pinapansin nila. Hindi nila napapansin lahat ng effort ko para lang mapasaya sila kasi palagi na lang silang naka-focus sa mali mo. Ang hirap non eh. Ang hirap ng feeling na parang pinapamukha sayo ng mga tao na ayaw nila sayo kasi imperfect ka sa lahat ng bagay, when in fact sila lang yung taong pinapahalagahan mo sa buhay mo. I don't want to elaborate some things more dahil alam kong lalala lang yung pain na mararamdaman ko ngayong gabi. So I just want to take some notes here.

1. You can't just expect people from loving you back just because you care for them too much. 
2. You can't just expect people from appreciating your hard works just because you do too much for them. Some people are just blind to see those little things because they needed perfection, and no human has this ability.
3. You can't just expect people from being there for you just because they said they are your friends. Some people are just better on saying things but a loser to make some actions.

You just have to take things gradually.

Or maybe appreciate those cruel things they do to you because, as they say, everything happens for a reason. So maybe they have their own purposes to do such things, unintentionally hurting you. And maybe you're just blinded by the pain you're feeling and things can't sink on your brain because you're too busy handling down the pain.

Okay, I'm such a weirdo. I don't understand what I'm saying.

Wala. Nagtatampo lang ako sa mga magulang ko minsan. Lalo na sa tatay ko. And it feels like I am being annoyed by him every single day. I don't really want to feel this because I love him, but there are those times that I'm being filled with anger and I can't even remember what "love" for him means.
Nagaway kami ng ate ko kagabi. Inis na inis ako sa kanya. I became very calm in everything I did, because I did not want to give a tear for a very immature thing. Wala lang. Wala na syang magawa sa bahay kundi iasa sa amin lahat, dahil lang sa palagi syang pagod galing sa trabaho. Pinipilit ko syang intindihin pero wala, hindi ko maiwasang mairita. Alam naman nila na napakasensitive ko, madali talaga akong mairita at umiyak kapag pinaiyak nila ako. Iniwanan nya ako sa baba ng hindi pinapatay lahat ng ginamit nya, computer, electric fan, lahat! Ako yung pinagpatay nya kasi maaga pa daw sya bukas. Is that an excuse? Kung maaga pa sya bukas, bakit pa sya nagcomputer? And she knows na ayoko talagang naiiwanan sa baba dahil matatakutin ako. She really provoked me last night. We ran upstairs and I swore I'll never turn off the appliances she used. Pero nagmatigas sya, tinulugan nya ko. SHE KNOWS HOW UPSET I GOT THAT TIME. She even laughed at me which is, nakakairita talaga. And to my deep anger, pinalitan ko yung code ng phone nya and tinago ko yung earphones nya because I knew mahalaga sa kanya yun. Ewan, for me, I just did it to give her a lesson. A lesson I really wished I could give for a very long time. Ayoko din naman syang tadyakan o sabunutan even if gusto ko talagang gawin, kasi alam kong papagalitan ako at pabababain kami pareho. Basta. Nagpuyat na lang ako kasi wala na din naman akong choice.
The next morning, hinampas nya ko ng adaptor. Lahat ng pwedeng ibato sakin binato nya na. And there I was, pretending that it was painless. I admit, it was really painful pero I didn't mind the pain because I am having fun watching her being incredibly mad. Tapos ayun, bumalik sa kanya lahat ng inis ko kagabi. I'm thinking of the karma I'll get that time. And after some hours, I finally knew it.
My mom got really upset with me for doing it. Sabi nya tamad daw ako, na konting patay na lang daw sa mga appliances di ko pa magawa. Tinotolerate nila si ate. Naiintindihan nila si ate sa mga kabalastugang ginagawa nya pero ako hindi. Sa akin nila sinisisi. Yung closeness namin ng nanay ko for the past weeks eh naglaho dahil sa simpleng kaartihan ng ate ko. Umiyak pa daw sya dahil lang sa earphones, ang laki laki daw na gulo yung ginawa ko. Ewan.
Naiinis ako. While taking a bath, I force myself to hold my tears even just for a moment but I did not know what happened because my tears keep flowing down. Random thoughts and dramas flashbacks to my brain and every painful word that enters makes my heart ache too hard.
When I read some books, my mom became kind at me again so I became happy also. I don't know, being moody is too hard. Then pagbaba namin, inopen nya na naman yung topic tungkol sa earphones na yan kaya nagalit si daddy and ang dami nyang pinagsasabi na masasakit. Kesyo ang tamad tamad ko daw. Kung hindi daw ako marunong sumunod sa mga utos nilang tatlo, lumayas na daw ako. It is too hard to hear those words. Anak niya pinapalayas nya. Palibhasa wala naman syang pakialam kung mapawalay man sya sa mga anak nya. Gawain nya kasi layasan yung mga pamilya na binubuo nya. Palibhasa napakamanhid nya, hindi man lang nya naappreciate lahat ng ginagawa kong mabuti para lang masatisfy sila and para maging proud sila sakin. Wala naman syang pakialam don. Sasabihin nyang mahal nya ako tapos bigla nya na lang akong papalayasin. Ewan. Nakakainis. Tagos sa puso yun. I can't really stand his attitude. Iniiisip ko na lang na tatay ko sya kaya kailangan ko syang mahalin, even though hindi man lang nya maisip minsan na anak nya ako kaya kailangan nya akong intindihin.Ang dami kong gustong sabihin sa kanya pero wala akong magawa, tumalikod na lang ako at tahimik na umiiyak.
Ewan ko, ang weird nya. Palagi nya na lang akong sinisisi. Sinisisi nya ako sa malaking kuryente namin. Kesyo daw computer daw ako ng computer at bukas ng bukas ng tv kahit hindi naman ako nanonood. Eh sya nga eh, magbubukas ng aircon buong araw tapos bubuksan din lahat ng electric fan pati pintuan at bintana. Sinisisi nya ako kasi ang tamad tamad ko daw, pero sya naman yung tambak ng tambak ng hugasin kung saan saaan at kalat ng kalat sa bahay kasi alam naman nyang may uutusan sya at may karapatan syang manermon dahil anak lang nya ako. Napakasuwail ko daw, at wala na daw akong mapapala sa buhay ko. Ewan ko. Hindi ko alam kung bakit ganyan nya ako pagsalitaan. Kaya minsan hindi ko masisi yung sarili ko kung bakit nasasagot ko na lang sya unti-unti at palagi na lang akong nakabusangot tuwing kakausapin sya. Naiirita ako ng bongga. Naiinis ako kasi palagi na lang akong sinisisi tuwing ginagawa ko yung best ko para maging ayos yung lahat.
Gusto ko silang yakapin at sabihin kung gaano ko sila kamahal pero wala silang time para don dahil buong oras nila eh nilalaan nila sa panenermon at pagaaksaya/paguutos.

PBB Housemates.

Tom - Matino. Kahit iniimpluwensyahan sya nila Kit, sumasagi pa din sa isip nya kung ano yung tama. Pero dahil ayaw nyang magalit sila Kit, dinadaan nya na lang sa tawa. Kinakausap nya ng mabuti lahat ng housemates. Kung katulad nila si Tom, wala silang problema. Hahahaha tengene. Maayos pagpapalaki dito.
Roy - Hard working masyado. Gusto nya ina-appreciate yung mga bagay na ginagawa nya. He really hates the feeling of being ignored despite of all his hard works and duties.Mabait naman sya, pero madaling maimpluwensyahan. Mababa yung confidence nya. Mahiyain. Basta.
Ryan - Nakakatuwa sya kasi napaka-kolokoy nya. Hindi sya yung tipong kapag may war, namemersonal. Well, minsan nagagalit sya pero he easily forgive and forget. Mabait din. Mahal na mahal nya yung family nya, which is gusto ko kasi I love family-oriented guys.
Yves - Ewan. Natutuwa ako sa kanya kasi he never gave up on Myrtle. He even gave up his friends because he wanted to stay with Myrtle. Even though Myrtle told him na kailangan nyang maghintay. And even though hindi sya yung tipo ng taong palaging sinasamahan ni Myrtle, andun pa din sya sa tabi ni Myrtle no matter what happen. The thing is, meron syang girlfriend. And hindi man lang nya inisip yun kasi para sa kanya, maiintindihan naman sya nito.
Vince - He's already evicted, first evictee. He's shy, and mabagal syang maki-close kasi mahiyain din. Mabait sya, matalino and hard working. He always do his best to reach his goals. Pero may pagkatamad pagdating sa mga gawaing bahay.
Alec - I really like this guy. Ang mature nya magisip. Basta, ayoko na syang idescribe kasi baka umabot to ng sampung posts.
Kit - I once liked him because of his appearance. Pogi talaga sya and hot. Naiintindihan ko naman sya nung minahal nya si Myrtle pero nagulat na lang ako ng bigla nyang layuan si Myrtle at awayin. He doesn't even know how to respect people. Masyado syang immature. Sarili nya lang iniisip nya. Gutumin din. HAHAHAHA. Tsaka madaling magsawa sa babae, he's not sincere with his choices.
Jai and Joj - Natutuwa ako sa kambal na'to kasi ang jolly nila. Tsaka mabait talaga, marunong magcomfort at umunawa. Ayaw nila ng away. Maganda pagpapalaki sa kanila. Nakakatuwa talaga sila. Mapagkakatiwalaan.
Myrtle - She's beautiful, inside and out. She's quite witty and she's mature. She knows how to sort out her priorities and she knows how to handle true love. Basta, trip na trip ko sya. Gusto kong sya yung manalo sa PBB. Although I'm not an avid fan of her, I really like her.
Mariz - Naiinis ako sa kanya kasi playing safe sya. Simula nung nanominate sya, parang puro pagpipretend na lang yung ginagawa nya. Tinatry nyang maging funny and she's trying hard to act like that. She's not that wise sometimes, and she's very emotional. Halatang bata pa. Pero natutuwa ako kasi at her age, nagagawa nya nang magsacrifice big things for her family.
Nikka - Second evictee. She's nice naman. Mature din. Knows how to stand up for her opinions and decisions. Although hindi sya ganon napapansin kasi simple lang sya. Nakakatuwa din.
Clodet - She's kind of annoying sometimes. She's mature emotionally and she tries to act like she's already 20. Nakakainis sya minsan kasi playing safe and feeling leader. Pero nakakatuwa sya minsan. Basta.
Karen - I hated her dati. Pero ayos na din. Masyado syang affected kay Kit kasi she had fallen in love with him and Kit suddenly leave her hanging. And she tries to get Kit back to her. Mabait naman sya. Matapang. Simple lang tsaka funny minsan. Totoo sya sa sarili nya, but sometimes things mess up and she can just unconsciously tell somebody bad things who offends others.
Claire - I don't know. Feeling ko hindi sya totoong tao. Tsaka masyado syang malambing and she's kind of.. cheap? Kasi naman parang ugaling pangtondo yung tinataglay nya. Pero maganda sya. Tsaka makulit. She reminds me of someone because of her voice. Basta. She has something different family background and she can just be too much emotional with situations.

Oo nga pala, hindi na ako nagtatampo kay Cj. Nahalata nya sigurong malungkot ako and I needed a friend to face my problems. However, napapansin nya ding hindi na nya ako nakakausap, which is alam nyang magpapalala ng situation ko noon. She said sorry, kung hindi na daw nya napaparamdam ang pagiging best friend nya. Wala lang, natouch ako. Kasi for the first time nyang magsorry sakin. I mean, tuwing may away kasi kami, sya palagi yung unang nagagalit. So ako palagi yung nageeffort para magkabati kami. Pero this time, sya yung unang nagsorry. Nakakagulat. Kahit hindi ko naman pinapakitang nagtatampo ako sa kanya, nagsosorry pa din sya. Hehehe.
She keeps on saying 'I love you' to me. Which makes me feel important and special. Which I needed this past few days.
And I thank God because of her, because of my family and because of everything, every blessing He's giving me despite of all my imperfections and mistakes.
I love you God.

I always do my best because I want to spend my life for greater things.

I was frustrated. It was a great morning, deciding whether to go or not to go to our friends' gala. I thought that would be the only problem that I was going to have that day. Until I logged in my facebook account and a chatbox popped out. It was Tyra. I thought she's going to nag me again, updating some news for me about her poser account. I was having second thoughts again whether to answer her o just pretend to be idled. Few minutes later I decided to type some things as a reply for her. Up to my shock, she directly told me that I've been listed on Silver, 2nd Section. I was shock of course. I don't really like being second. I'm still have doubts about what she said, I was really assuring if she's serious or maybe, she's just playing a prank. But later on, I'm gradually believing her. It was really sad, I know. My heart's beating faster than normal. I was frustrated because I'm afraid my parents would get angry and disappointed. They'd think that I'm not doing well, while in fact I did my best to reach one of my goals - to be in the top section, Gold. I told Mom that I didn't make it. She's in bad mood and she's kind of disappointed for me. I'm starting to cry and my Mom's getting mad at me. Later in the afternoon, she told Dad and my Dad's blaming me as if I never did anything good. It was really heart-breaking, of course. My parents were kind of ashamed of me.. no I mean, they're really disappointed and kinda mad at me. I'm crying a bit during dinner. Okay, I'm weird. I know.

I'm asking God why, of all people who got in the Top List, why me? Why me, who really do want to be in Gold, fell on Silver despite of my high grades and early enrollment? Why me, who really wanted to learn something and to be challenged, fell on Silver with some freaky students? Why me, who really wanted to make my parents proud, fell on Silver despite of giving my best to make them satisfied? God knows how special for me, being in Gold. That always included on my prayers, but God didn't gave me that wish. I don't know, I know I deserve it, because I really had a hard time doing my best to enter that section. Questions keep entering my thoughts and my heart beats faster and faster without any certain cause. I'm nervous, afraid and really disappointed. But all I know is, I do trust God. 

The next day, I begged for mom to accompany me on Monday and to please the registrar to move myself on another section. We have reasons, not just 'I wanted to' but to question them why they did it, although I have high grades and surely qualified. Whenever I talk to mom about that, I can't stop myself on crying. To the point that I can't breathe because of the pain inside me, inside my heart emotionally. I pity them, and I blame almost the whole world because of my lost. I don't even know why I take this seriously, and I think nobody understands why I care for this thing. But when I talk to mom, I can feel that she knows how disappointed I am, and she knows that I need comfort and ears to hear my emotions. She said she will do her best to reach my goal, because she believes in me. I realized how blessed I am for having a great mom like her. 

This morning, we went to our school. It was really awkward and annoying because of the staffs. We pleased the registrar about the section thingy. I don't even know why people like them should exist in our world. They didn't even give mercy. They said I can't be moved because people would be mad if they notice something changed or moved in the list. I wanted to shout at them, I wanted to say everything I wanted to, but I can't speak a word because the pain inside me stops me from talking. My mom said everything she can, even excuses and untrue stories just to please them. But they never did. It ended up useless. 

I didn't make it because of my teacher, in TLE. He always gave me below 85 even if I did really well in class. Because of him, I didn't enter the section I wanted to be in. He always block the way to my goals. I really hate him as much as he hated me and my classmates. I mean, I hated him more.

I have no choice but to be satisfied.

I don't know, I think I'm kind of happy now. 

My mom's contented with me, maintaining my section. But I don't think dad's fine with it. He keeps on blaming me over and over again. But I have also no choice but to understand him, even if I know it's too hard. 

God, I understand why. I knew the answers now. I just hope I could be happy with this school year. I don't want to suffer anymore with some fake friends and freaky teachers. This time, I wanted to enjoy and to be good for something. I know I can do it. Just guide me. I love you and I always trust you with all my life. 

:)

I realized, the key to hapiness is to be contented with everything you have. Always wear a smile, and always look in the bright side. Trust God, He knows what's best for you.

Ewan, nakakalungkot. Parang unti unti na din akong nagtatampo kay Cj. Wala lang. Parang ayaw nya naman ako maging kaklase eh. Parang mas pipiliin nya si Libot kesa sakin. Wala, ewan! Hindi ko masabi. Hindi ko alam kung dapat ba akong magalit o hindi dahil doon. Pero parang nagtampo lang ako. Lalo na dun sa picture ni Kath ng section namin. Sabi nya,
"Yey! Magkaklase kami ni Pam!"
Para bang mas natuwa sya na kaklase nya si Pam, parang di man lang nya napansin na magkaklase din kami. Ewan, my love for my best friend decreases day by day. Sa tingin ko, dadating din yung araw na mapapaisip na lang ako, "May bestprend ako noon eh, pero.. sino nga ba sya?". There comes a day that I would forget her name, and she will forget mine. So I have to learn not to care for a person too much that I forget taking care of me, myself and just end up losing because I realized, that person didn't care a bit for me at all.
Mukha akong tanga magenglish. Pardon me. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

Simula Grade 4 ako, palagi na lang akong napagiinitan ng mga teacher.
Grade 4: Dapat talaga, ako yung 1st honor non. Mas matalino talaga ako kay Janus. Pero madaming umeepal sa buhay ko. Nung grade 4 ako nagsimulang magmature. Nagmature ako physically and emotionally. Eh public ako non. Palagi pa akong gumagala kapag walang teacher kasi mabilis akong mabored. Meron din akong crush noon, alam ng buong section namin at nung section nung crush ko. Then one of my rivals (which is my very close friend) turned her back against me. Siniraan nya ako sa teacher ko. Kesyo daw may boyfriend na ako chu chu. Tapos tinuro nila sa teacher ko yung crush ko. So parang sumama na yung tingin sakin ng teacher ko kasi akala nya malandi ako, kesyo ang bata bata ko pa may boyfriend na ako. Pero ang totoo, crush ko lang naman yun. Iba ang crush sa boyfriend.
Grade 5: Palagi na lang akong pinapagalitan ng teacher ko kasi president ako non eh. Tapos ang dami pa naming kalokohan. Tapos palagi pang uma-absent yung teacher ko kaya palagi kaming nagpa-party party tapos tuwing pagbalik nya, hindi na mapinta yung mukha nya. May time din na naimpluwensyahan ako ng mga kaklase ko, tuwing may kulang yung tray, sa pondo kami kumukuha ng pambayad. Eh masama pa naman yun. Meron kasing epal na nagnanakaw sa pera namin kaya kami yung napapagalitan. Sumama din yung tingin nya sakin pero close pa din kami, mabait kasi yung teacher namin na yun. She even helped me to step on success. Kaya malaki utang na loob ko dun eh.
Grade 6: Akala ng teacher ko may boyfriend din ako. Tengenenenenene. Gala din kasi ako ng gala. Pero akala nya matalino ako, kaya ginawa nya akong Top 6. HAHAHA ang galing nga eh. Hindi pa naman ako masyadong nageffort nun. Okay, kayabangan2k12.
1st Year: AKALA DIN NG TEACHER KO MAY BOYFRIEND NA AKO. Gala din kasi ako ng gala. HAHAAHAHAHAHAA porket umalis ka lang saglit, akala na ng teacher may pinupuntahan ka nang di kanais nais! Asar! Eh ang totoo non sa canteen lang ako palagi, palagi kasi akong gutom. Nakakaasar lang. So ayun, ang baba ng binigay nya sakin sa Science kahit ako dapat yung Top 1 samin. Naging top 2 na lang ako. Huhuhuhu. Tapos di pa ko napunta sa top dahil sa mga sub teachers ko. Lalo na kay san juan. Sarap nun ipa-assassinate. Sana magkaron ng sinkhole sa desk nya sa faculty. Bwisit sya.
Palagi na lang. Akala nila may boyfriend ako kasi matured na yung katawan ko. Eh usually yung mga ganitong pagmumukha, malandi eh. Ewan hahahaha. Karamihan samin, kapag matangkad may boyfriend na. Asar lang.

Dear Chamber of Secrets,
Alam mo bang nasasaktan ako ng sobra sobra? Ewan ko. Eh kasi naman, hindi ko gustong mapunta ako sa Silver. Ayoko talaga, promise. Ayoko ng mga tao doon, ng tipo ng pagtutulungan, LAHAT. Gusto ko talagang mapunta sa Gold. Gusto kong maranasan kahit minsan yung feeling na may napala ka sa pagpupursigi mo. Madami na akong plano kapag naging Gold ako. Balak ko pa ngang tumakbo ng Vice-President eh, syempre no! Hahaha. Tapos gagawin ko lahat para manalo kami sa lahat ng activities. Ngayon, wala na atang pagasa. Ewan ko, ang sakit sakit talaga. Mas mabuti pang saktan ako ng isang lalaki kesa naman mapunta ako sa Silver. Naiinis talaga ako. Top 21 ako sa over-all, tapos yung Top 22 and Top 37 (baka pati yung 38), nakasama sa Gold. What the fuck is that? Nakakainis!
Yung mga taong nangongopya sakin dati, nasa Gold na. Yung mga taong tinulungan ko para umangat, nasa Gold na. Yung mga taong mas pinahalagahan ko kesa sa sarili ko, nasa Gold na. Bakit kung sino pa yung handang tumulong, sya pa yung napagiiwanan?
Na-disappoint si mommy. Ayun yung ayaw ko eh. Yun yung nakakapagpaiyak sakin sa lahat lahat. Sayang lang yung tuition fee na binayaran namin kung sa Silver lang din pala ako babagsak. Sayang lang yung aga, yung pagpapauna sakin ng nanay ko i-enroll. Sayang lang yung paghihintay namin sa BPI ng dalawang oras para lang mai-enroll ako agad at baka sakaling mapunta ako sa Gold. Sayang lang yung pagod ko, sayang lang yung pagpupursigi ko, sayang lang lahat. Palagi na lang akong talo. Palagi na lang akong napagiiwanan kahit ginagawa ko naman yung best ko para umangat. Alam mo ba kung gaano kasakit yun? Yung ginawa mo na yung best mo, hindi pa din pala sapat. Nakakainis talaga.
Lord sana po namalikmata lang si Tyra. Sana GOLD din ako. Lord, kapag napunta ako sa Gold, hindi ko na talaga sasagutin yung nanay ko. Hindi na din ako magdedemand sa inyo na sana kami magkatuluyan ni Mikko Sanz. Hindi na din ako magagalit sa mga kaibigan ko kapag may pagkukulang sila sakin. God, sana po mapunta ako sa Gold. Yun lang naman po ang hiling ko eh. Mas pipiliin ko po yun kesa sa mga gadgets, sa mga Ipod, sa mga computer. Please lang po God, para naman po hindi masayang yung tuition fee ko at hirap ng mga magulang ko sa pagpapaaral sakin. I trust in you God, with all of my life. Please make ways. Mas pagiigihan ko pa po sa 2nd year, gagawa na po ako lahat ng projects kahit sobrang hirap, kahit nakakatamad.
Sana din po mabasa ito ng Registrar namin at maawa sakin. Please, ilagay nyo na ako sa Gold.:"(
Nasasaktan at nadidismaya,
Chloe.

Usapang kaibigan.

May mga taong hinusgahan ko dati pero sila din pala yung mananatiling andyan sa tabi ko hanggang sa huli. Naaasar ako sa sarili ko kasi sila din pala yung magiging kaibigan ko kahit nainis ako sa kanila ng bongga. Mas pinahalagahan ko yung mga taong akala ko totoo sa akin. Mas pinahalagahan ko yung mga kaibigan ko na hindi pangmatagalan.
Kahit papano eh masaya na din ako kasi andyan pa din sila para sa akin. Hindi tulad ng iba na binigyan mo na nga ng halaga, iiwan at iiwan ka pa din.
Wait, kaninong Show ba to? It's your show! It's your time! It's Showtime!

Usapang PBB.

May naaalala lang ako sa mga housemates. HAHAHAHAHA. Yung tipong tuwing nakikita ko sila eh parang may naaalala akong tao na kaparehas ng ugali nila. Like:

1. Mika (Karen) - Ito yung kaklase ko na wala, nakakaasar. Vice president namin sya and may crush sya sa dati kong crush na si Jeremy, yung PRO naming walang kwenta. HAHAHA. Wala, tuwing may meeting maglalandian lang sila. Magagalit ako tapos titigil sila. Maya maya, kulitan na naman. Si Mika kasi, sya lagi yung nagsisimula. Tapos si Jeremy papatol. Ewan, nakakaasar.
   Mabait naman sya. Kaso ewan, ang OA nya tsaka malandi na corny. Tsaka pa-cute sya palagi. Bossy! Kapag nasa serious mode na, magseseryoso sya tapos sisisihin nya ng bongga yung mga taong nasa paligid nya. Like, sisisihin nya yung mga kaklase namin na maingay eh sya nga yung nagpapasimula ng ingay. Ewan nakaasar bwisit. Pero ayos lang, di ko sya ka-close kasi ayaw ko talaga syang i-close ng bongga. Plastik minsan, tapos wala na lang syang ginawang mabuti kundi umiyak. Minsan nakakaasar. You know.
   Well, ang pagkakatulad lang nila ni Karen eh yung pagjojoke nya. Ganun na ganun sya magjoke. Magi-english sya ng barok tapos feel na feel nya kasi akala nya nakakatawa. Mas corny nga lang pagdating dun kay Mika. Pero ewan. Tsaka malandi. HAHAHAHA. Tsaka bossy, na mahilig manisi.
2. Karlotta (Claire) - Wala, hmm. Hindi ko alam kung ano talaga ugali ni Karlotta pero tuwing nakikita ko si Claire eh sya yung naaalala ko. 
3. Ako (Myrtle) - Parehas kami ng ugali ni Myrtle. Pero hindi ako mabilis mapamahal sa mga tao. Tsaka mabilis akong mainis. Pero parehas kami pagdating sa mga works and tasks. BASTA. Hahaha!
4. Kathleen (Clodet) - Magkamukha sila. HAHAHAHAHAHAHA pero ewan, matured masyado si Clodet pero si Kathleen immature na ewan. Basta magkamukha sila.
5. Ellen (joj) - Yung kaklase namin noon na sobrang friendly. Mabilis maawa. Basta! Mabait yun eh. TAPOS SOBRANG FRIENDLY NYA TALAGA AS IN SOBRA. Pero madali syang madala sa mga issues. Kapag sinabihan mo sya ng paninira, maniniwala agad sya pero hindi sya yung taong magagalit talaga ng todo todo. Bastey.
6. Wala, magiisip pa ko. HAHAHAHAHA. Basta madami silang katulad.

First love never dies.

Si Dylan, yung first crush ko. Okay, so napakabata ko pa nung una akong nagkacrush. I think I was.. 5 years old? Hmm, prep! Tapos ayun. Si Dylan yung pinakamatangkad, masungit, matalino, pogi sa mga boys sa amin. So what could you expect? Sya yung crush ng buong section namin. Merong patay na patay sa kanya. Si Wailey ba yon? Ewan, di ko alam yung spelling. HAHAHA. Pero she's chubby and she's loud so hindi sya naging crush ni Dylan. Ang crush nya, si Hannah. Yung pinakamaganda't pinakamahinhin sa amin. Magka-service sila. Every afternoon, tuwing naghihintay na kaming lahat sa mga service namin, palagi na lang silang magkasama tapos kami naman ni Wailey yung magkasama. Ewan, si Wailey lang ata nakakaalam na crush ko si Dylan. Meron pa ngang time na naglalaro kami ng aso't pusa eh. Unang round, si Dylan at Hannah pati si Chloie na may crush din sa kanya. Enjoy na enjoy sila, umabot pa sila hanggang canteen. Tapos nung 2nd round, bigla akong tinawag ng teacher namin. Nataranta ako kasi hindi ko alam gagawin ko. Mukha akong timang doon. Tapos ayun, nagulat ako kasi biglang nag-go yung walangyang teacher namin. Hindi ko alam kung saan ako tatakbo. Bigla akong tinaya ni Dylan habang hindi pa ako nakakagalaw sa kinatatayuan ko. Pinagtawanan ako ng buong klase. ANG SAYA SAYA NILA OKAY. I'm such a dork wtf. Meron ding time na sa sobrang ingay ko eh napapunta ako sa tabi ni Dylan. Shet yun! Pero katabi din ni Dylan si Hannah so no1curr.

Nagtransfer na ako sa St. John Bosco after prep. Hindi ko na sya ulit nakita. Well, maybe I did. Nung nagpakain ako ng aso tapos pauwi na ako, nakasalubong ko sya with his family. Hindi nya na ako naaalala, he didn't even look at me. Nagaalangan pa ako kung si Dylan yun o hindi pero I think he was. Pero after that, never ko na ulit syang nakita. Okay. NEVER.

Nung first day of highschool, I made friends. And nakatambay kami sa stairs. So nasa gitna kami ng tawanan at kwentuhan nung may sinabi sa amin yung new friend namin na si Ellen, "Grabe yung lalaki oh, nakatingin sa atin. Grabe!" then tinignan din ni bessy "Oo nga! HAHAHA grabe naman titig satin nyan!". Nakatalikod ako non dun sa sinasabi nilang lalaki tapos nung titignan ko na, sabi nila huwag daw. Kasi baka mahalata kami. Pero nakatingin daw talaga samin, na parang sakin lang daw. Ewan ang weird.

The next day, pasakay na ako. Nung nakita ko si Dylan sa may sakayan kasama yung pinsan nya. Nakatingin silang dalawa sakin. Grabe! Schoolmates kami ni Dylan! Tapos tinitignan nya ko tapos kapag titingin ako sa kanya eh iiwas na sya. Inabangan ko kung saan sya papasok. And it turns out na magkaharap kami ng room AND SYA YUNG LALAKING TUMITINGIN SA AMIN THE OTHER DAY. Grabe! Nashock ako.

After some days, nakakasabay ko sya sa jeep. Minsan tabi kami, minsan hindi. And parang bumabalik yung interest ko sa kanya but I'm not sure if it was a crush kasi feeling ko hindi naman talaga. Then yung close friend nya na tropa ni Ellen, ginawa naming bridge. Okay so landi. Hahaha. Tinatanong namin kung saan sya nagaaral nung prep at kung may kilala syang chloe. He said wala daw. Hindi na daw nya maaalala yung mga bagay noon. He's already aging HAHAHA. Then yun, sabi nila crush daw sya ng mga babae sa room nila. I lose hope. And yun nga, hindi ko na sya crush agad agad.



May time na chi-nat nya ako. Tinanong nya ako kung taga saan ako, tapos kung saang school ako nagaaral, tapos anong year, anong section. Alam nya naman yung mga sagot don pero parang pinapahaba nya lang. Ang weird weird nya pero effort eh. HAHAHAHAA. Tapos sabi ko, "Ano to, slumnote? hahahaha" tapos ayun, may mga times na ini-english nya na ako. HAHAHAHAHA natatawa talaga ako. Parang nagpapakitang gilas. Tapos sabi nya, babye na daw kasi gagawa pa daw sya ng assignments. Ayun. HAHAHAHAHA. Nakakatawa kasi halatang nagsisinungaling na parang nagpapaimpress.

After some weeks, sabi nila may crush daw sakin si Dylan. Tuwing magkakasalubong kami, bigla na lang akong igigreet nung mga kaibigan nya na "Chloe si Dylan nga pala" tapos maghihiyawan sila tapos kikiligin kunwari si Dylan. Ang sweet, natutuwa ako pero I just hadn't feeling for him. Then may time na nasa labas sila ng room tapos malapit kami sa kanila, tapos sinigaw nilang lahat na "CHLOE CRUSH KA DAW NI DYLAN! HAHAHA" tapos ayon ngumiti ako sa kanila. Tapos nagtawanan sila bigla, ewan ko kung anong nagawa ko non. Yun pala nagjoke si Dylan na sobrang ewan talaga. May halong pangaasar sakin. Eh I was busy that time and ayoko ng mga bad jokes so tinarayan ko konti sila. hahaha. Hindi ko na din sya nakakasabay sa jeep kasi palagi na lang syang late. He's being bad boy na. Hindi na sya yung dating matalino, nagpupursigi sa pagaaral. Palagi na syang napupunta sa order and discipline.

Nung napansin nila na parang wala na akong interest kay Dylan, parang unti unti din silang umiwas. Hindi na sila magkakantyawan. Akala ko wala na din syang crush sakin pero may mga times na kapag dadaan ako, kakalabitin nila si Dylan secretly and ngingiti sila. Ewan~ Ang corny nila pero nakakatuwa. AHHAHAA.

Tapos may time na nakasabay ko sya ulit. Tapos magkasunod kaming sumakay. Nauna sya, tapos parang nagulat sya kasi tinabihan ko sya. Pero umusog din ako kasi may tumabi sa kanyang babae, ewan ko kung nanay nya o tita o kapitbahay. Tapos bumaba din agad yung babae. Tapos umusog si Dylan ng bongga, halos magkadikit na kami tapos nahalata kong ngumiti sya. Ewan, ang sweet nya. HAHAHAHAHAHAHA nakakakilig. Yung ganun palang nakakakilig na eh. Okay. =)))

Pero ewan, nahihiya pa din sya sakin. May time nga na galing kami ng faculty tapos nasa labas sila. Tapos pinapagalitan sila nung pinakadamuhong teacher sa lahat (adviser nila tapos sub teacher namin na walang kwenta talaga magturo) Ewan, hindi ko maintindihan yung mukha nya non. Para bang sinasabi na, "AY !@#$%^&*() BAKIT KAILANGAN PA NYANG DUMAAN DITO" tapos nakafocus yung isip nya sa pagdaan ko kesa sa sinasabi nung teacher. Halata eh! Tapos ayun, akala nya siguro matu-turn off ako sa kanya. Hindi nya alam natatawa ako kasi ewan, nakakakilig. ANO BA TO ANG WEIRD KO NA DIN HAHAHA.


Wala lang, namimiss ko na sya. Sana mapapunta sya sa Top 5 sections para magkasama kami sa Dimas next year. Hihihihi :">