I feel so hopeless at times, and what makes my heart ache more is the fact that no one seemed to care. It seems like no one understands me, especially at the time when I need someone to be there when nobody else does. It seems like everyone has to blame me for everything. And everyone had to make me feel like I do no good in everything.
Sinisisi nila ako sa lahat ng bagay. Lahat na lang pinapansin nila. Porket nakikita lang nila akong nagko-computer, ako na agad ang dahilan kung bakit ang taas ng kuryente namin. Why do they have to be so cruel to me? Lahat na lang ng mali ko pinapansin nila. Hindi nila napapansin lahat ng effort ko para lang mapasaya sila kasi palagi na lang silang naka-focus sa mali mo. Ang hirap non eh. Ang hirap ng feeling na parang pinapamukha sayo ng mga tao na ayaw nila sayo kasi imperfect ka sa lahat ng bagay, when in fact sila lang yung taong pinapahalagahan mo sa buhay mo. I don't want to elaborate some things more dahil alam kong lalala lang yung pain na mararamdaman ko ngayong gabi. So I just want to take some notes here.
- You can't just expect people from loving you back just because you care for them too much.
- You can't just expect people from appreciating your hard works just because you do too much for them. Some people are just blind to see those little things because they needed perfection, and no human has this ability.
- You can't just expect people from being there for you just because they said they are your friends. Some people are just better on saying things but a loser to make some actions.
Or maybe appreciate those cruel things they do to you because, as they say, everything happens for a reason. So maybe they have their own purposes to do such things, unintentionally hurting you. And maybe you're just blinded by the pain you're feeling and things can't sink on your brain because you're too busy handling down the pain.
Okay, I'm such a weirdo. I don't understand what I'm saying.
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