Masakit pala yung ganoon.

This would be one of my greatest secret ever: I sometimes open my number 1 BFF's facebook account to see their conversations with our schoolmates. Selosa kasi ako. Madamot ako pagdating sa kaibigan. I make sure na hindi ako mapapalitan ng kung sino sino lang. We are known for being best "bestfriends" on 1st year kasi kahit anong manyari, kami lagi magkasama, tsaka we treat each other like bubble gums, sisters. Anyways, I checked their (her and her "uh-nee"/alina) convo some time and I discovered her crush! Which is never nyang sinabi sa akin. At first nalungkot ako kasi I thought, she doesn't trust me like I trust her for my entire life. Never nyang sinabi sa akin, AKO na best friend nya since Grade 3. Sinabi nya kay Alina na naging katext lang nya several days ago. Sa lahat ng oras na magkasama kami, all I ever knew is wala syang crush. Syempre sobrang nalungkot ako non. Pero I always keep this in my mind : kasalanan ko din naman tong pain na ito kasi pinili kong pakialaman yung account nya eh. Tsaka choice nya naman yun kung hindi sabihin sa akin eh. She's my BFF after all. And this thing won't end our friendship.
Kanina, viniew ko naman yung convo nila nung crush nya. They had 5000 pages of messages! While 1000 lang yung sa amin! Pero ayos lang, kinilig din naman ako kasi ang sweet nila kahit papaano. And then, binasa ko yun lahat. Hindi ko lang matanggap yung nabasa ko sa middle, it was on October 2011. When we were creating so much happy memories and enjoy ourselves with each other. My best friend asked him who are his Top 3 bestfriends. He answered, Nell, Taks and my best friend. Well, I don't really believe that kasi syempre, hindi naman pwedeng hindi isali si best friend ko kasi tinuturing na best friend ni best friend ko si crush nya. And then when he asked her back, she answered, "UNA, SI GOD. SUNOD, YUNG BFF KO SA CHURCH. PANGATLO, IKAW." Nagulat ako. Sobra. Wala ako? Samantalang tinuturing nya akong BFF for ages? Samantalang sya ang naging first BFF ko and for all this time, sya pa din ang pinipili kong best friend? Ganon din naman yung sinasabi nya sa akin eh. She loves me because Im her BFF. Pero kapag pala kausap nya yung crush nya, Im her ordinary friend na lang? Napalitan na pala ako ng crush nya? WOW HA, nakakalungkot lang.