This is exactly what I feel since I turned 16. Days after my birthday, Ate Joy started showing me her unfriendly side, sir told me he doesn’t want/like me, choir started to become a boredom and all the love and passion I had gradually vanish.

Sometimes I think maybe it is me. Maybe people become like this because I am like this. Maybe they take me for granted because I’m a humorless person, someone who take everything seriously.

I ask myself: where have the old you gone? Where did the Chloe who gets attention by her witty remarks and hilarious expressions go?

Now, I just feel so different. I believed I’m so unique and interesting, that I’m so easy to love if only people would know me better, that people would want to be with me because I’m happy to get along with. But with how people treat me nowadays (when I entered the choir, particularly), I started to doubt myself. I’m turning to a dull person who gets overly conscious when talking because they might misunderstand or they might think I’m “bobo”.

Sometimes I just want to disappear. I want to just leave the wrong people and find the old me, wherever it was hidden. Before I completely turn to the person who they think I am.

Before I completely believe that I am who they think I am. Before I forget who I actually am, if people would only know me better.

Sometimes, being so different from the average feels wrong. Especially when the world surrounding you sees you the wrong way.